As parents, we are given children and sometimes a small skill set to prepare us, and then we are left to our own devices. We hope and pray at the end of the day that we make the right decisions for them, that we grow them to be people who are capable of making the right decisions for themselves and that they turn out to be good, honest, loving people. But how do we know we're making the right choices? How do we know that we have the right answers, or if there even is an answer? How do we take these little, formidable people and mold them into something strong and capable and honorable? And how do we know, along the way, that we haven't made some major mistake that will impact them for the rest of their lives?
I want for my kids to grow up and share stories of their wonderful childhood, of the fun they had, the things they did and what they learned. I want them to be proud of us as parents and to want to be parents like us. And how do you get past this overwhelming feeling that you've failed them? That you could have done something different, something better, something more?
I'm trying to believe that I have been the best parent I could be, and to learn from my mistakes and shortcomings and to be better, to grow and to provide more for them in every capacity. I'm trying to rely on my faith that the Lord wouldn't have given me these children if I wasn't able to parent them successfully. I'm trying to see things through their eyes, to teach them in ways they can learn. I'm trying to dedicate time and effort to their success in a different and more meaningful way.
That's all we can do, right? To learn with them and change when we see our current method isn't working. To pray that God is doing bigger and better work in their lives than we can ever imagine. To trust in His plan and know it is better and greater than ours. So, with a new perspective, I am challenging myself to be more for them.
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